Today it was my turn to lead our Church History tutorial. To nobody's surprise the topic was the Catholic Counter-Reformation. I usually get quite anxious when talking to groups of people, and with all eyes on me I was a nervous wreck. It's not even like I had not done the reading, or not written any notes -actually I'd written so many: down the side of page, arrows everywhere, that I panicked myself even more.
Anyway once I started talking, albeit a bit shaky at first, I finally found my feet and got into the swing of things. With a topic dear to my heart, discussion was lively. The question of merit and its role in justification was raised, just as thoughts on whether the Council of Trent was called in direct response to the Protestant Reformation were shared. It was not until afterwards, that I realised it was moments like these that I truly felt what it meant to struggle with my faith. The questions that arose were of great interest to me and I longed for them to be answered.
In a tutorial group of predominantly open Protestants, it was always going to be difficult to clearly get the Catholic view across. But with the little knowledge I had, and with the help of Cardinal Cajetan and St Ignatius of Loyola, I was able to persuade some of them to, at least, entertain the idea that reformation within the Church was not solely dependant upon Protestant criticism. Not only was this tutorial a chance for me to finally voice my opinion, it was also an opportunity for me to learn more about the faith that has made me who I am.
And on that note, I should really write my essay for tomorrow.
It is going to be a very long night.
I walked into the kitchen to find a large black patch on the hob. Something had clearly burnt. It was not until my friend confessed to accidentally leaving our fashionable toaster timer on it, that I discovered the extent of the damage.
I'm surprised the fire alarm didn't go off.